Wow - I just realized that my Happy Birthday to Moonbeam post was my 100th post! Crazy!
Anyhow, I've decided this will be my last post here on Hoping for Hannah - so sad that it has come to this....but sweet Moonbeam is with her new family and I am not certain if I will be getting any updates - I'm still hoping, but as of now it doesn't seem likely. I will continue to pray for her and she will always be in my heart!
This journey has taken so many unexpected twists and turns. I am so thankful that none of this has taken God by surprise and that even though I don't really understand why things have turned out the ways they have - His plan is still unfolding....He is still in control!
I am starting a new adoption journey - I will be blogging about it here. I hope and pray it will end differently, but I know that no matter the outcome I will still be His.
One thing I have definitely learned during this journey to adopt is that this is not just my journey - I am amazed at the ways God has impacted others through my journey - huh? You mean it's not all about me? :)
I re-discovered this post on another of my blogs and it really fits with where I'm at now....this journey is not just my own...hope you'll join me.
Showing posts with label life lessons. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life lessons. Show all posts
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Sunday, July 12, 2009
4 Days Without Luggage
Have you been wondering why I'm wearing the same thing in every picture posted from my visit trip to Kyrgz? Sadly, I've been feeling a bit self-conscious because I haven't really explained why. The story is that both my and Elisabeth's suitcases were delayed. I mean really delayed! We arrived very early Monday am into Bishkek and our luggage finally caught up with us late on Thursday night.
Have I mentioned what the weather is like in Bishkek in August? Well let me just say scorching hot! And not an air conditioner to be found - except for the one in our driver's car. And with five people packed into a Jetta - well - you can imagine!
You know, when you're without the comforts of home and you're visiting your daughter in an orphanage - you begin to realize what is really important. And clean clothes and air conditioning just aren't at the top of the list.
Each day when we arrived at the orphanage I wondered how much clothing Moonbeam would be wearing? On some visits she had nothing more than panties on. Which I don't think she minded too much since it was brutally hot, but still, it just really emphasized for me just how much stuff I own. It was a really humbling experience. And a very good life lesson to be learned - again and again.
Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying we should all sell everything and live in poverty. However, I find that I am focused on living from a more grateful space and I continually try to be generous with what I have.
Back to the story, when Elisabeth and I arrived in London on Saturday, for our vacation time there, it was so exciting to need a sweater (London seems to be cool, wet and rainy all year long) and to find our luggage made it with us this time! Not sure I've been happier to greet a suitcase!
Do we look a little giddy? :-)
Have I mentioned what the weather is like in Bishkek in August? Well let me just say scorching hot! And not an air conditioner to be found - except for the one in our driver's car. And with five people packed into a Jetta - well - you can imagine!
You know, when you're without the comforts of home and you're visiting your daughter in an orphanage - you begin to realize what is really important. And clean clothes and air conditioning just aren't at the top of the list.
Each day when we arrived at the orphanage I wondered how much clothing Moonbeam would be wearing? On some visits she had nothing more than panties on. Which I don't think she minded too much since it was brutally hot, but still, it just really emphasized for me just how much stuff I own. It was a really humbling experience. And a very good life lesson to be learned - again and again.
Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying we should all sell everything and live in poverty. However, I find that I am focused on living from a more grateful space and I continually try to be generous with what I have.
Back to the story, when Elisabeth and I arrived in London on Saturday, for our vacation time there, it was so exciting to need a sweater (London seems to be cool, wet and rainy all year long) and to find our luggage made it with us this time! Not sure I've been happier to greet a suitcase!
Do we look a little giddy? :-)
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Faithfulness, Part Two
Sometimes God reminds us of His faithfulness through the stories of others. Today was one of those days for me.
I had the opportunity to go to Cherry Creek Presbyterian Church this am. I went to hear my friend Tami speak about her adoption journey in Kyrgyzstan. Cherry Creek Pres is hosting Tami's "Red Card" program. It's an eight week Sunday School program designed to teach families about advocating for Children at Risk around the world. Find out more about this amazing program here.
Anyhow, I digress, Tami shared about God's faithfulness to her both during the adoption journey and since. It was so encouraging to hear the many ways that God answered prayer for her daughter and others. As I listened, with tears in my eyes, I felt a surge of hope! As if God was reminding me, I haven't forgotten, I am at work, I do have a plan.
After she shared her story, Tami passed out pictures and prayer requests from six of the waiting families (including me). She asked each of the tables to pray over the child and the requests from the waiting family. She also asked them to write notes of encouragement to the family. It was such a blessing to know that over 100 people were praying for the waiting 65 families. I stuck around at the end and helped Tami collect the cards from the tables - I was so excited to see how many cards there were! At least 5 per family and some even more than that (some of the tables were fuller than others)! It will be so fun to get these in the mail and will be yet another reminder of how God is touching lives through this wait.
At the very end of the time, as people were leaving, this little old man came up to me, with tears in his eyes, to tell me he was praying for me and for my daughter. He gave me a hug and had to turn away - he told me "you know, I just don't cry". OK, now I'm crying.
God is so faithful! I love the 3rd chapter of the book of Lamentations. It lists all the reasons for hopelessness, and there are many of them in this case, but then a turning point in verse 21 and following:
Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:
Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him."
The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him;
it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.
Yes, great is Your faithfulness, dear Lord!
Read the whole chapter here.
I had the opportunity to go to Cherry Creek Presbyterian Church this am. I went to hear my friend Tami speak about her adoption journey in Kyrgyzstan. Cherry Creek Pres is hosting Tami's "Red Card" program. It's an eight week Sunday School program designed to teach families about advocating for Children at Risk around the world. Find out more about this amazing program here.
Anyhow, I digress, Tami shared about God's faithfulness to her both during the adoption journey and since. It was so encouraging to hear the many ways that God answered prayer for her daughter and others. As I listened, with tears in my eyes, I felt a surge of hope! As if God was reminding me, I haven't forgotten, I am at work, I do have a plan.
After she shared her story, Tami passed out pictures and prayer requests from six of the waiting families (including me). She asked each of the tables to pray over the child and the requests from the waiting family. She also asked them to write notes of encouragement to the family. It was such a blessing to know that over 100 people were praying for the waiting 65 families. I stuck around at the end and helped Tami collect the cards from the tables - I was so excited to see how many cards there were! At least 5 per family and some even more than that (some of the tables were fuller than others)! It will be so fun to get these in the mail and will be yet another reminder of how God is touching lives through this wait.
At the very end of the time, as people were leaving, this little old man came up to me, with tears in his eyes, to tell me he was praying for me and for my daughter. He gave me a hug and had to turn away - he told me "you know, I just don't cry". OK, now I'm crying.
God is so faithful! I love the 3rd chapter of the book of Lamentations. It lists all the reasons for hopelessness, and there are many of them in this case, but then a turning point in verse 21 and following:
Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:
Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him."
The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him;
it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.
Yes, great is Your faithfulness, dear Lord!
Read the whole chapter here.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
A Big Decision
About a week ago I made the decision to pursue a concurrent adoption. I am in no way giving up on bringing Hannah home - I will wait as LONG as it takes! I believe that God has called me to be her mama. I also have always wanted to have two children and the longer this wait becomes the more I feel I should begin the process of daughter number two. It's been a really hard process. I have been thinking and praying about this for months. I haven 't acted until now, because I didn't feel I had clear direction and couldn't get any peace about it. The peace finally settled on me about a week ago and I decided to "go until I get a NO!" (gotta love that Erwin McManus - see a great video about this topic here.) Everything feels so out of control and part of me is just so ANGRY that this path has become so rocky! Even angry at God - thankfully, He is big enough to handle it and I believe, wants me to be honest about my feelings - don't believe me? Just read some of the Psalms of David - there's a man after God's own heart who also failed miserably (remember Bathsheba?) and vented his anger at God a time or two.
Anywho, I digress, I met with my agency, collected all of the necessary paperwork and left feeling pretty excited about going forward with adopting a waiting child from the foster care system. These feelings of excitement quickly faded as I began filling out the paperwork....ugh! This is round three of the arduous task of applying to adopt! (Guatemala - closed, Kyrgyzstan - on seemingly interminable delay and now domestic) Seriously, I must be a lunatic! Nobody signs up for this much punishment! Sigh....
But, I will move forward - feelings change all of the time and I don't feel lack of excitement about the paperwork is the "No" that would lead me to stop. And overall I am still excited about the other side of the paperwork...a sister for Hannah!
Anywho, I digress, I met with my agency, collected all of the necessary paperwork and left feeling pretty excited about going forward with adopting a waiting child from the foster care system. These feelings of excitement quickly faded as I began filling out the paperwork....ugh! This is round three of the arduous task of applying to adopt! (Guatemala - closed, Kyrgyzstan - on seemingly interminable delay and now domestic) Seriously, I must be a lunatic! Nobody signs up for this much punishment! Sigh....
But, I will move forward - feelings change all of the time and I don't feel lack of excitement about the paperwork is the "No" that would lead me to stop. And overall I am still excited about the other side of the paperwork...a sister for Hannah!
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