When you have waited to be a mom since you were a little girl, and waited to complete an international adoption for two and a half years (I started with Guatemala) you begin to lose hope and in an effort to protect your heart you choose not to hope. You begin to choose not to dream about having your little girl at home with you. You start avoiding looking at the pictures of her sweet little face, not because you don't adore her, but because looking at her pictures makes your heart ache so intensely you don't know if you can bear it. You begin to wonder why God would not want to make your dreams come true.?
As 2010 begins, I really sense God saying to me - I want you to "dare to hope"! Even in the midst of the ongoing uncertainty. Even if your heart continues to break - dare to hope! Hope in Me, in my love for you, in my love for Hannah and all of the waiting children. Hope in My commitment to and passion for orphans.
Following along with the Lajoy's adventure of adding two more little girls to their family, reminds me that with God ALL things are possible. (Matthew 19:26)
And so, this year I will dare to hope!